Running the Race

After 2 rounds of chemo the tumor had shrunk nicely. Then two more rounds of chemo. There was however no improvement of the paraneoplastic symptoms. We both noticed she was getting worse.

There were more tests earlier this week and the tumor was growing again. This happened so soon after chemo that the doctor said that there was no reason to believe that more chemo would help, and that chemo treatment would only make her more miserable.

On Monday we will be signing up for hospice care. We are not unfamiliar with hospice as my wife was a hospice nurse for several years. As a matter of fact, My wife helped train the nurse that will likely be coming.

We both are Christian, and know that in order to start our eternal life we must shed this temporary body. We have run a good race together and it may soon be time for us separate for a while, but we will be together again soon... and for now, we will share, and live this life, as much as it has to offer.

Worry... It Won't Help

I had a little problem today. I was trying to pay some bills, which causes me much stress. I called one of the people I owed money too and my right eye started blacking out on me. It only lasted a couple of minutes. and went back to normal. I checked my blood pressure afterward and it was up to 155/102 for a while. I took my blood pressure medicine and a little later I to 1/4 of one of Angie's lorazepams. in two and a half hours it was down to 114/74. I'm sure that it is just stress now.

This happened a few months ago... the second week of February. It happened on and off for three or four days. It's called "amaurosis fugax" and may signal the possibility of a stroke. I pray God watches over me so I can care for my wife.